There isn’t much that makes me miss my Xbox 360. I’m not trying to single out Xbox here, I’d say the same thing for my PS3. When I move to next gen I like to leave the old ones behind. Not that I can this gen with the past simply being remastered and placed back in front of me. Don’t believe me?
- Gears of War: Ultimate Edition
- Castle Crashers Remastered
- Tearaway Unfolded
- Uncharted: The Nathan Drake Collection
- Dishonored: Definitive Edition
- Final Fantasy VII
- Darksiders II: Deathinitive Edition
- Day of the Tentacle: Special Edition
- Resident Evil Zero HD Remaster
- God of War III Remastered
- Prototype Biohazard Bundle
- Devil May Cry 4: Special Edition
- Payday 2: Crimewave Edition
- Final Fantasy X/X-2 Remaster
- State of Decay: Year One Survival Edition
- Dark Souls II: Scholar of the First Sin
- Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
- Final Fantasy Type-0 HD
- Devil May Cry: Definitive Edition
- Grim Fandango Remastered
- Saints Row IV: Re-Elected
- Grand Theft Auto V
- Halo: The Master Chief Collection
- The Binding of Isaac Rebirth
- Sleeping Dogs: Definitive Edition
- Metro Redux
- Diablo III: Ultimate Evil Edition
- The Last of Us Remastered
- Oddworld: New N’ Tasty
- Tomb Raider: Definitive Edition
Anyway, remasters are a different topic for a different blog. I miss my Xbox 360. The reason…
My friends, I’ve been writing paragraphs for the past two hours and I simply cannot explain the environment of ilomilo. Cuteness on this level is indescribable, unconscionable, and should be made illegal. This game will murder you with cute.
I’m not kidding.
The music makes everything about life instantly better by spewing unicorns, rainbows, and cuddly kittens from your speakers. This, combined with the plushy design and adorable animations, will cause the cute to get in your eyes, your ears, your lungs, just about every pore on your body. Like a seagull trapped in an oil spill, you will be smothered in the thick, slimy, inescapable, death-puddle of cute this game excretes from the moment you press start. And you will love every moment of it.
Ilo and Milo…basically red and blue gumdrops who, similar to my chest, have a single long black hair…are best friends. They wander through their world of fluffy pillow boxes attempting to find each other. There are little safkas (tiny pillow children), Sebastian (a sad little man who flies on a little grumpy, pillow bumblebee critter), pillow whales…
Ilomilo is so darling you will gouge your eyeballs out…you might as well, because you will never see anything more adorable in your life. Not even YouTube, with all its kittens, babies, and puppies, will fill the void this game will blow in your mind.
You control Ilo and Milo, helping them solve the map so they can be together again. Finding each other grows increasingly more difficult with each level. You must switch between controlling each character in order to complete the puzzles, moving around normal pillow boxes, extending pillow boxes, flying pillow boxes, springy pillow boxes, rotating pillow boxes, or trap door pillow boxes. Wandering, mustache-wielding cow pillow boxes with an appetite for apples aid you in your journey. If you are playing with two people, you’re assigned to Ilo or Milo and take turns controlling the characters.
While I have read people are upset about no split screen or online play, the turn-taking style was absolutely perfect for a couple killing time on a lazy weekend. Your turn? Wander around collecting items, searching for a way to connect with your partner. Not your turn? Take this opportunity to dip an Oreo in milk and enjoy the snack as you observe the map from a new angle. Twisted, Double Stuf, or classic…your call. There is no judgment here.
You can also press buttons to cause little puppets to pop onto the screen and play the drums or tuba…or move your mini fly version of your character around the map to help point out directions…or tickle your friend…again, no judgment.
I will admit, the one major flaw I can find in this game is that single player truly makes you feel like a single, player. The game was made to be played with another in the room. Without company, it harshly reminds you of how sad and alone you are. You don’t have a cute, cuddle buddy to wave to, tickle, and eventually find yourself face to face with.
Do you have a significant other? Do you both enjoy solving puzzles by working together? Do you want to die being swallowed whole by the inky black depths of cute?
If you said yes to the above…let me tell you what to do…and yes, this is what I did. Go to *shudder* Bing search engine and make an account. Dedicate five minutes of each morning to searching with Bing until you gain enough credits to redeem the $5 Xbox gift card. Some times there are extra points if you go to the dashboard. Once you earn enough, go buy ilomilo for $5. Then search until you get the $3 gift card and get the Autumn Tale DLC. Or just buy it all outright…it’s up to you.
You can play this game once a year as a ritual and forget the solutions to the puzzles by the next year. While I had an Xbox, this was a tradition around holiday season for my wife and I.
Seriously everyone, this game is $5…the price Journey should have been in order to get the perfect score in value that ilomilo is getting.
But understand, if you do not have a partner to play with…it’s just not as fun to play with yourself.
My rating assumes that you have someone you will co-op with. If you do not, disregard this review and do not buy this game. Ilomilo, perhaps not intentionally, is at its best when played by a couple. While playing with yourself can be fun, the fun doesn’t last long. Playing with just a friend can get awkward the longer it lasts.
This is my favorite game to co-op with my wife. The pace created by taking turns is perfect for relaxing with someone you enjoy spending time with. How someone could think of a game so adorable without their head exploding first is a medical mystery, and the world is a much better place because of it.
Best two months worth of Bing searches I ever spent.